Do you enjoy having sex? I ask this because you don’t seem to know much about certain aspects of sex, i.e. how to prevent a pregnancy and it seems to me that if you don’t understand birth control at all that you may not know how to have an orgasm either.

One important part of birth control is how effective it is. The withdrawal method is not effective because there may be sperm inside his penis from the last time he ejaculated that would enter your vagina in the Cowper’s fluid, some fluid that comes out of the man’s erect penis before he ejaculates. All it takes is one lucky sperm to get you pregnant. A condom is effective as long as it doesn’t tear or fall off but since that can happen, it’s really about 75% effective. And the birth control pill is about 99% effective. So if you’re on the pill, you shouldn’t have much to fear about having another unintended pregnancy, but it could happen. If you remain on the pill and he either pulls out or uses a condom too, that will boost the effectiveness somewhat, but not to 100% because some people are just not lucky. But if you’re close to 100% safe, then that should alleviate much of your fear. Just understanding all there is to know about birth control will be helpful to calming those fears, so I strongly suggest you get a book on sex and study it carefully.

As to the soreness when using a condom, I would suggest that you use a lubricant. (Water based, like KY jelly because oil-based product will degrade the condom.) Of course you should also be aware that only condoms prevent the spread of sexually transmitted diseases. If your boyfriend happens to have a disease, and most people who are infected don’t know whether or not they have one, and you rely on the pill, then you could get it too. So unless he agrees to be tested, you should use condoms to prevent the spread of disease and the pill to keep you from getting pregnant.