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How Do I Get Out Of Sympathy Sex? |
 I recently lost a friend to cancer.
I am very close with her family. Her husband and I have been talking a lot lately and he has made it very clear that he would like to sleep with me. It's been a long time for him and he feels isolated. I'm not a prude nor do I have any feelings other than friendship for him. I don’t want to cause more pain. We live very close to each other and we have talked about the fact that he is confused and traumatized right now.
I wouldn’t object to offering him some friendly comfort right now but I don’t know if this is appropriate?
 Since you asked me, my opinion is that it is inappropriate. If you were telling me that you each had feelings for each other and were hesitant because the death of his wife was so recent, then I might tell you to put those doubts aside and be grateful that you’d found each other. But having sex out of sympathy is just not a good idea. You can’t predict the ramifications but if you were to go ahead, you could certainly regret it. That you’ve already discussed this possibility is to my mind having gone too far, given that you don’t want to form a relationship. So be firm and tell him that you’re willing to listen to him and give him comfort in that way, but not physically.
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