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I've Lost My Orgasm... HELP!!! |
 I am 38 years old I have been with my husband 9 years and sex was amazing in the first few years but lately I have to fake orgasm.
There are times I do climax but is very rare. What can I do to fix this problem? When we have oral sex I always have an orgasm. Why is that? Please help!
 If a woman is very aroused, she can have an orgasm during intercourse, even though her clitoris, the seat of a woman’s orgasm, is not directly stimulated by the penis. In your case, when the relationship was new, you were very aroused, and so even though you weren’t getting direct stimulation to your clitoris during intercourse, you were still having orgasms. Now that you’ve been together for nine years, you’re not quite as aroused and so intercourse isn’t enough of a stimulant. But you can still have orgasms if your clitoris is stimulated directly during oral sex, and that’s what is important. Your situation is not uncommon; in fact a majority of women cannot have an orgasm from intercourse alone.
What you must do is stop faking orgasms and explain to your husband that things have changed and that you need more direct clitoral stimulation. Now perhaps if he gives you enough stimulation before you begin intercourse, you might still be able to have orgasms from intercourse. If not, then he’ll have to give them to you either orally or manually, before or after intercourse. But don’t allow yourself to remain sexually frustrated. There are going to be other changes in your sex life as you age, to both of you, and rather than try to hide them by faking, you must face up to them and adapt to them so that you have as satisfying a sex life as possible.
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