I Am Expecting Too Much From Sex?
ImageMy boyfriend of 4 years and I started having sex just recently.


He and I are both 18 and virgins and well since I had never had sex before I didnt know what to expect. So we had sex a couple times and within minutes he would ejaculate and be done and at first I thought it was normal since he got aroused very quickly. But now a couple months have passed and that problem continues, we manage to have sex for 20 minutes tops and then he has his orgasm ,ejaculates and hes done and Im no where even near achieving an orgasm. Is it normal for sex to be like that, or am I stuck in the fantasy that sex is for hours and you can have an orgasm every minute. Could there be something wrong with either one of us??

ImageReading your question Im afraid you have many misconceptions, and Id bet most of them come from watching people have sex in the movies. So the first thing you have to realize is that what you see on screen is not reality. And its very important to know the truth about sex, both the good things, about having orgasms from sex, and the bad, which includes sexually transmitted diseases and unintended pregnancies. So my recommendation to you is to get a book, like the one I wrote, Sex For Dummies, and read all the parts that apply to you. (I give you permission to skip the chapters on sex for seniors for example.)

However, to briefly answer your questions, most women cannot have an orgasm from intercourse alone, no matter how long it lasts. A woman needs clitoral stimulation in order to have an orgasm, and since the penis doesnt actually touch the clitoris during intercourse, you can see why women need other stimulation to have orgasms. Some women can get sufficiently stimulated during foreplay, when her partner stimulates her clitoris manually or orally, to then have an orgasm during intercourse while others can have an orgasm during intercourse if the couple are using a position where her partner can stimulate her clitoris with his fingers, such as the female superior position. But other women cannot have orgasms during intercourse at all and have to have them either before or after. But I dont have space to give you an entire lesson, so please get a book and learn as much as you can so you can get the most pleasure for both you and your boyfriend.


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