We were all having a good time and I noticed one of his friends kept checking his phone so i told my husband to give me his number so I could play a trick on his friend. I dialed his friends number with my phone knowing he wouldnt recognize the number because he doesnt know my number. I thought my husband was ok with the joke so I dialed a few more times then I told his friend in front of my husband it was me all along that my husband had given me the number. Now my marriage of 12 years is ending because my husband thinks I was attracted to his friend but I am not in the least bit attracted to his friend. My husband say he wont forgive me until I tell him I was attracted to his friend but I rather loose the perfect home, life and marriage I don’t want to lie to him and say that i was attracted to his friend just to save the marriage. Why is he letting a stupid joke ruin our marriage. PLEASE HELP me understand.

I wish I could help you to understand because just based on what you’re telling me, I don’t have a clue why he reacted this way. Does he act jealous regularly, or did this come out of the clear blue sky? If he’s always the jealous type, then his reaction might make more sense, and hopefully eventually he’ll cool off. But if this was a first time for him, then I’m at a loss to explain what happened. One thought that occurs to me is that his friend, the one you were calling, got very angry at him after the fact, and that he’s now blaming you, just to pass on whatever sense of embarrassment he felt when his friend yelled at him. But that’s just a shot in the dark. If he’s not normally a hot head, my recommendation is for the two of you to see a marital counselor. The counselor will talk to each of you separately, and hopefully find out what’s really going on. You may not get an explanation, as your husband may tell the therapist to keep it a secret, but at least the therapist might be able to use the information to patch things up between you. I agree that it would be ridiculous to wreck your marriage ove something so silly so see if a professional counselor can’t help you both out.