Must Great Sex Involve a Vibrator?
ImageI have met the man of my dreams and we are sexually active.

We have been dating about 4 months. The sex is wonderful. My problem is that it takes me a very long time to have an orgasm and many times I can not. It seems I can get to the threshold so to speak but can't get it to happen. He is 62 and I am 51. Before we started dating, it had been a very long time since I had had an orgasm. He is beginning to think that he is doing something wrong and I tell him that it's me not him. He bought the vibrator you endorse (the eroscillator) and it makes the orgasms much more intense but not very frequent. Have any suggestions for my dilemma? ImageThere is no law that says you have to have an orgasm every time that you make love. You say the sex is wonderful, so the bottom line is that since you enjoy having sex with him and do have orgasms, though not every time, I dont want you to worry about it. In fact, the worrying of whether you will or wont have an orgasm could be contributing to your difficulties reaching orgasm. So my first suggestion would be that you should continue having sex together, you should continue trying to have orgasms, but if after a while you see that its not going to work, then just stop and let him hug and kiss you and forget about the fact that you didnt have an orgasm. Perhaps, in a month or two, after youve removed the pressure to have orgasms, you may discover that youre having orgasms more frequently. If that doesnt happen, and if you are dissatisfied with the number of times youre reaching orgasm, then go to see a sex therapist. There could be lots of other factors at work and it would take a few sessions to figure out what was happening and to see what the answer might be. But for now this doesnt seem like a crisis, especially since you can have orgasms from time to time, so see what happens if you ease up on yourself before you try any other measures.

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She can't orgasm
She can't orgasm
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