Before we did, he would manually stimulate me to orgasm. It never took very long for me to achieve it. When we first started having sex, I would climax sometimes, not every time, but I was okay with that. Now, when we have sex, I rarely have an orgasm. He always comes within a couple of minutes and then tries to manually stimulate me, but I almost never orgasm. He says it takes forever. He always feels bad about it and apologizes. I have tried to tell him that it is not his fault, but I think he feels guilty that he is satisfied and I am not. At first this didn't bother me too much, but now I am becoming quite frustrated. I just wish we could have an orgasm together. He says he wants to please me. He has even tried oral sex on me, but he never stays there for long. He gets me heading in the right direction, but he always goes back to stimulating me with his fingers. I want him to be able to bring me to climax. I just don't know how. While I still have a strong desire to have sex with him, I have become very discouraged. I don't want to be selfish, but I need some satisfaction now and then. Like I said he makes an effort, I just don't know why I am having so much trouble coming. I can feel it building and building and then nothing, it's like I can't get any further than that. It feels great, but it's frustrating to get to the edge of climax, just to be left hanging.

My basic suggestion for the two of you is for him to give you an orgasm first, manually or orally, and then have intercourse so that he gets an orgasm. Once he is satisfied, he’s going to have less incentive to do whatever it takes to give you an orgasm. But if his orgasm is somehow tied to your orgasm, then he’ll do whatever it takes to accomplish that.

There is probably more to your problem than just that one suggestion covers. However, if you can get on track in that one area, the other pieces may just fall into place. So why don’t you try this and see what happens. If it doesn’t work, write back.