How Do I Get My Sexual Confidence Back?
ImageI'm 34 years old and I haven't had sex in 6 years, partly because I wanted to get over a bad relationship before I got involved with someone again, partly because I don't feel good about the way my body looks, and partly because I've just been busy.
But now I'd like to have someone and I feel like I've lost all of my sexuality. I've lost the sexual confidence I had in my 20's and I'm not sure how to get it back. I feel like the best sexual years of my life are being spent with a purple vibrator! Is this normal? When I listen to people talk, I wonder if I'm dysfunctional somehow by not being able to attract someone.

Image Please drop the word normal. It doesnít matter what other people do, it only matters what you do and how you feel.

While I would say it was probably a mistake to spend six years not trying to find a mate, because imagine all the possibilities that you missed, itís never too late to try, and certainly not at your age. If youíre not happy with your body, start doing something about it. Begin an exercise regimen, today, and if possible at a gym where youíll have the opportunity to meet some single men. Exercise will also help lift your spirits, making it more likely that a man will be attracted to You, not just the physical you but all of You. I donít know where you live, but with winter starting, if youíre near a ski area, I would recommend taking up that sport. Get a girlfriend or two to go with you and I guarantee that while youíre in a ski community, youíll be running across lots of men. And since youíll be covered in all sorts of warm clothing, whatever physical faults you may think you have will be covered up.

I would also recommend that you start telling everyone you know, family and friends, that youíre coming out of your six year hibernation and that you want to meet a man. Someone is bound to know a single man that they will arrange for you to meet. Donít worry whether it works out. Just use every opportunity to hone your skills at the dating scene so that when you do meet Mr. Right, and you will, youíll be better prepared. And who knows, blind dates have produced great matches so go on them with a positive attitude.

 
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