Should I Lose My Virginity to Him?

ImageI am 19 years old and I am thinking whether I should have sex with my boyfriend or not. He is 32 and he also has got another girlfriend for 4 years (I guess she is in her mid-twentys). So these two facts make me think about if I am doing the right thing. Having the first time sex with a more experienced man may be better because he is also very careful when we are together (and he knows how to touch a woman)  but I do not know if I am doing the right thing. I do not really love him but I think he is physically and sexually very attractive.

I know that he won't leave his girlfriend and just wants to sleep with me but the thought of having sex the first time with a person who knows what he is doing is very seductive especially because I have heard that most girls think that their first time having sex is not so good and this could be a way to have it better. On the other hand maybe it is better to have sex just with persons you really love so this is my dilemma. Everywhere people are having different opinions about sex and this is very confusing. Also most of my friends are having sex and so I am putting myself under pressure because I am a very curious person and I want to know what is so special about sex. I hope that you have good advice that could help me to make the right decision.
ImageLet’s back track a moment here. Why are you calling this 32-year old man your boyfriend when you know he already has a girlfriend (and for all you know a wife somewhere too.) He’s not your boyfriend, he’s a man who is cheating on his girlfriend, whom you admit he’s not going to leave. He may be experienced, but it seems to me much of his experience is not the kind you want anything to do with.

You will always remember the first time you have sex. Do you want that experience to be forever linked in your mind with some man who also broke your heart? I understand that with all the talk about sex it puts pressure on young people to experience it, but the fact is, sex without a relationship is just not that great. If you need sexual release, masturbate. What you should really do is stop seeing this man, and once emotionally freed from him (which may take a few weeks) start looking for someone who will want to be only with you because he loves you. Then, at some point, you’ll have sex. And even if the two of you don’t stay together for the rest of your life, that first time will be nestled in with all the other good memories you’ll have of this relationship, rather than sitting amidst a the wreckage of a relationship that will leave you nothing but regrets.

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