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My husband of 9 months isn't interested in sex

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Home

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Dr. Ruth's Q & A

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For Her

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For Him

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For 50 & Over

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Sexuality-Encyclopedia

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Ask a Question

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Tips from the Lips

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Dr. Ruth Around Town

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Dr. Ruth's Books

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I have a Tip

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All About Dr. Ruth

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Dr. Ruth Reviews

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Media Contact

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Dr. Ruth Gallery

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My husband of 9 months isn't interested in sex
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Image I have been married for about 9 months. In total my husband and I have been together for 7 years. The sex was never WONDERFUL, but we used to have it quite regularly (about 1-3 times per week). As the years have gone by he has stopped initiating sex at all, and I've got turned down so much that I started feeling less and less sexy. Now I just can't be bothered initiating anymore, because I feel it's all one sided. In the past 6 months we may have had sex 2 times (both times initiated by me) I can see he enjoys it when we do it, but he never seems interested unless I make him turned on. We are best friends but I miss the intimacy of a sexual relationship with him. My big worry is that lately I don't seem to want sex with him at all. I even fantasize about other men when masturbating because he just doesn't 'do it for me'. I felt bad about it about a month ago, initiated sex but I didn't enjoy it at all while we had the sex, because i kept feeling irritated that I had had to initiate yet again after so many months of no sex! I know that he used to enjoy porn, his preference was looking at older women on the net than having sex with me - which didn't make me feel any better about myself, since I was a live woman dying to have sex with him. But lately he hasn't even been looking at porn. what do you think the matter could be? How do I get him to want me? Is our marriage going to fail?

Image Perhaps your marriage is going to fail. I go around saying that sex is the glue that holds relationships together and maybe people donít understand what I mean exactly, but here we have the perfect example. Youíre good friends but youíre no longer lovers and the marriage is certainly teetering. The two of you need to restore your sexual relationship or this marriage will end.

If you were just boyfriend and girlfriend, ending the relationship might be the best thing. But since youíre married, absolutely, 100%, the two of you need to go for counseling. A professional is needed to find out exactly what is going on inside his head. Iím not saying that the marriage can be saved, because we donít know why he doesnít want to have sex with you any more, but you need to find out. You shouldnít end a marriage blithely without knowing exactly what is going on. So ask around for recommendations, find a therapist and then talk to him or her about making an appointment. Good luck.

 
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Image
Tips From The Lips.
People, Places & Things That Make You Feel Sexy.

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She can't orgasm
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She can't orgasm
Read more...
 
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