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My girlfriend cheated on me days before our anniversary |
 My girlfriend and I have known each other for 7 years and we've been dating for 3 1/2. Since I’ve known her she has told me that she couldn't achieve an orgasm while having sex but she could orally. I must admit this put a damper in my self esteem and as time went on I began to want less and less of her because I felt like she was just performing a duty. Well, three days before our anniversary she told me that she cheated. It wasn't spontaneously, it was plotted , planned and executed betrayal. She also revealed to me that she had achieved an orgasm with this man. I have no idea what to do and I have no one who I fell comfortable enough with to tell the entire story to. MY WORLD HAS BEEN SHATTERED , PLEASE HELP !
 After a quick reading, one might be tempted to blame this young lady but when I reread your e-mail and saw that you said “I began to want less and less of her” I realized that this relationship was on the rocks. She felt that you didn’t want her as much, and while what she should have done is either tried to fix the relationship or leave you and then find another man, that she cheated is somewhat understandable. She didn’t cheat because she expected to have orgasms from intercourse, since she’d told you she’d never had them before. She cheater because she wanted to prove to you and even more so to herself that she was desirable, since you no longer desired her.
I guess your relationship is beyond repair now and over. If not, then do try to repair it. And the lesson you must take from this, whether with this young woman or another, is that if you sense that the relationship has some serious cracks, don’t ignore them but discuss them and try to make repairs so that this sort of thing doesn’t happen to you again.
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