My problem with your question is that I don’t believe in couples having sex with other people, either together or individually. That your wife has had sex with other men with your consent does seem to open the door to you having sex with other women, but if there’s a lot of this going on, then I wouldn’t count on the marriage lasting very long. At some point with all this carrying on, one of you is likely to decide that a partner you were having sex with was more desirable and that would be the end of your marriage.

I understand that after a time people would like change, but there are a lot of things people want that they can’t have. Just because you can’t afford a fancy car doesn’t give you the right to steal somebody else’s car, does it? Marriage is a wonderful institution and if a long-term marriage isn’t as sexually exciting as it once was, you get a lot more out of marriage than just sex, and so it’s a trade off you should be willing to accept.