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We've been together for 10 years but rarely have sex |
 My boyfriend and I have been together 10 years and have had very happy and wonderful relationship. Our sex life has never been frequent. For the
last year we have sex once a week on the weekend in the morning. I can't
stand the routine but I take what I can get because I really can't stand the
infrequency. I mustered up the courage to ask him about having more sex.
He thought this was a great idea. However, after the discussion nothing
changed. I brought it up again 2 months later. He made some excuses and
then finally said that I could have sex whenever I wanted. All I would have
to do is put my vagina in his face and he would be more than happy to
oblige. I'm not sure what to make of this. I'm not comfortable with this.
Yes, i'd get to have more sex out of the whole situation but It feels as if
he isn't attracted to me per say. I know that nudity is generally a turn
on, but this seems unreasonable. Is this a matter of how men and women
differ when it comes to attraction or is he asking me to do things he know I
won't do to end the conversation?
 You say you’ve been together for ten years but don’t say how old you are, and in particularly how old he is and his age may be a factor. I say that because a man’s level of testosterone, the male sex hormone, is highest in the morning and I advise older men who have difficulties becoming aroused at night to have sex in the morning. If he is older (or at least not so physically fit which has led to him having some problems getting an erection) then that might explain your schedule. And if you both work, then weekday mornings might be problematic as you’re both getting ready to go to work. Here’s what I would suggest. One morning during the week, set your alarm 30 minutes or so earlier than normal and try to initiate having sex. If you’re afraid that might not work, then try making plans to have sex early some weekday morning so that you can both go to bed a little earlier, if that would help. If this works, then don’t complain about it, but go with it. Let me know what happens.
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