Our second child was born about two and a half months ago and since we began to have sex again, about four weeks ago, I can't seem to orgasm at all. We had great sex throughout the pregnancy, right until the week before the baby came. Now, however, I can get aroused, wet, and it all feels nice, but there is no orgasm. I am nursing our baby and I know that does crazy things with your hormones, but I nursed our first child too and didn't have any issues then.

Both my husband and I are wondering why I suddenly can't get off. I'm still young (24) and quite healthy. The whole situation is incredibly disappointing for me. My husband doesn't have as good a time either since he gets a lot of his pleasure from making me feel good. Any insight to our problem or tips on what we can do to get back to our normally outstanding sex life?

You have two children, one an infant, and so my guess is that you’re tired and preoccupied. This is keeping you from having orgasms. I don’t believe it’s a physical problem, but a mental one. My suggestion would be to get some time away together. A weekend would be best, but even a night in a motel might be helpful.

I don’t want you to put pressure on yourself to have an orgasm. Instead, I want you to relax. See if you can find a motel that has a hot tub. Maybe you should even bring an alarm clock. After you’re nice and relaxed by the hot tub and maybe a glass of wine, you can take a one-hour nap so that you’re really rested.

The more rested you are, the better. Then make love slowly and see what happens. If you can jump start your orgasmic response, my guess is that you won’t have these problems, at least not regularly. So get away from the home front for as long a break as you can and let me know what happens.